Tuesday, August 28, 2007

looking for peace among patterns

pattern august 27
my sacred life, august 27

attempting to let go of some of the old patterns, the samscaras, of my life. examining them daily - this is who i am - and sometimes it is tiring. but, then there are the moments when i can step outside myself to realize i can stop examining and simply loosen the grip a bit and move on. let go. let something greater than me take over holding tightly for a while. realize that maybe holding on too tightly has created this groove that could become impossible to stop tracing. i do not have to hold it all up. i can take a breath. i can take a breath and allow peace to fill the maze of trenches the patterns (the ones i must let go) have created. i can (let peace in).

looking for a shift by rearranging and letting go of some of the physical things in my (our) space. looking for closeness and warmth and rooms that feel more like nests and less like storage spaces. letting go of the stuff that held significance once and now just collects dust. sending it on to be loved by someone else. looking for more peace in less clutter, more peace (between us).

being honest about what i need. what. i. need. being honest with myself first. being. honest. with. myself. (first)

letting go (trying to let go) of the invisible piles (of guilt).

finding peace in this new corner of my home where my favorite chair, my first big purchase just for me years ago, now resides. we were going to give it away, but simply rearranging has created the perfect space. it is my new corner to work and nap and read and curl up with a favorite plaid blanket. it is another little space in my home; my home: the place i spend most of my hours. it is another space where i can seek and find peace (within).

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