Monday, February 25, 2008

feeling...

gathering



tired tonight. recovering from sunday's migraine complete with dizziness and blotches of wavy blurriness and the echoes of a bit of pain from my wisdom tooth pulling a week ago...

hopeful about a shift in the way i look at certain patterns in my life...being honest with myself about how repeating these patterns hasn't been working and deciding it is time (to try) to be honest with others as well.

happy about new designs that are making there way from paper to three dimensions.

melancholy about how much i miss her...found a picture this weekend that i have often passed by because it just isn't a great picture of me...but she looks beautiful...and i can't believe how healthy she looks...just nine years ago...how did she die six years later? how is it that it has almost been three years...the missing, the ache, will never leave...this is what i know to be true.

excited about an upcoming trip…chicago for the weekend and then indiana the next few days. "home" for the first time in over two years.

quiet about a few things…just needing a bit of space as i shift and push and breathe.

blessed to have friends (a couple near and few far) who get me…who really get me. (thank you)
*******
i guess tonight, i feel like i am gathering up the feelings…the bits and pieces of this life and living it…really living it.

my heart is open as i walk…as i dance…in my life.